Computer joke, anyone?

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go toa computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.

"Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs ." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the . The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After abrief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:"You have tennis elbow.Soak your arm in warm water.Avoid heavy lifting.It will be better in two weeks."

Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled.He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the . The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:

"Your tap water is too hard.Get a water softener.Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins.Your daughter is using cocaine.Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.Your wife is pregnant with twin girls.They arent yours.Get a lawyer.And if you dont stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

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  1. XxDJToxic420xX, 08 December, 2009

    LMAO – That’s a new one, i like that one….that’s freakin hillarious! HAHAHAHAHA….sucks to be bill though 😉

  2. whosaidthat?, 08 December, 2009

    lol. that was good

  3. sameer_pasha4, 08 December, 2009

    nice

  4. El, 08 December, 2009

    hahaha…

  5. Pd, 08 December, 2009

    ha ha funny LOL

  6. Pummi, 08 December, 2009

    ok!!!!!!

  7. hanmabookie, 08 December, 2009

    I just found a new favorite section.

  8. Asher S, 08 December, 2009

    An oldie but goodie.

  9. Vass Emanuel, 08 December, 2009

    nice one. :))

  10. joe, 08 December, 2009

    thats cool

  11. kikkirya, 08 December, 2009

    LOL , Nice .. B)

  12. jay Z, 08 December, 2009

    u cool u rock u cool u rock
    u cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rocku cool u rock u cool u rock

  13. JT, 08 December, 2009

    hahaha

  14. ~♥AleX♥~, 08 December, 2009

    Your joke is so cooL

    A THUMBS UP FOR YOU!

    I REALLY GOTTA EMAIL THIS TO FRIEND!

    SO HILARIOUS, SO FUNNY! OMG!

    CONGRATULATIONS A 10 FOR YOU!

    IT IS SO 100% FUNNY!

    THIS WILL BE MY NEW FAVORITE JOKE!

  15. I_love_GerardWay, 08 December, 2009

    lol VERY FUNNY!! xDDDDDDDDDDDDD (^_^) never heard it before!

  16. bakesomebread, 08 December, 2009

    heard this before it was not funny then it is not funny now

  17. Raju, 08 December, 2009

    Hehehe, Nice.
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